Here We Go...

"Minimalism is the intentional promotion of the things we most value and the removal of everything that distracts from it. It is a highly personal journey that forces you to identify and articulate your highest values." From this blog.

this is a more personal post instead of the pictures of or stories about our cute daughter, but one that directly affects my family. i, lisa, have been circulating the idea of minimalism in my head for the past few months. although this is something that i truly want to pursue and develop in my life, wow, does it come with resistance i never really thought was there. i found myself becoming angry when i'd notice ben had taken down some decoration or boxed up some items in our house (that were rarely being used) about a month ago. i retaliated, in a way. i bought something to replace it. i dug it back out of the box and put it out again. i held on to it. and what was it? stuff. things that didn't even hold meaning. except that i find my creativity, my artistic "touch" is often the work of decorating my home. MY home. as i say it, it's almost like marking my territory. letting everyone know that this is my domain. and of course i have that right in my house. i have the right to make it a home. but taking a step back, letting the anger subside and really appreciating the small changes ben made; i'm seeing that it's still a home. it still feels comfortable and now i start to question the rest of the stuff. i start to think, how can i still make this feel like home with a bit of my personality with LESS?!

i'll back up a bit here...i'm an organized person, but i know i like to buy things. i like to display things and i like to have things. i don't have a lot of stuff (yes, there are many bins of things that i feel i'll use one day...), but i also don't have multiple closets full of unnecessary things. one of the things that really attracted to me to ben when we first started dating, was his truthfulness in who he was--never trying to be someone he wasn't. and it was also the way he lived. he didn't have junk laying around, things that didn't serve a purpose. he recycled (and was pretty adamant about that, and living in a college dorm room, this was unusual). he didn't need things that would only just accumulate dust. but he also had things that meant something to him. so it seems right that he is finally starting to live in that again. it must have been hard living with me--someone who is constantly adding things to our home. but he is also allowing me to see that it's okay, it's going to be all right to live with less.

and so part of this rant is my confession of how uneasy i feel about the changes that i want to make. that we want to make. it will be emotionally difficult at times. and it will also feel triumphant.

of course this will be a S L O W process, but that's okay. it will need to happen within before it can happen without (wow, does that sound like something a Zen master would say or what?)! hehe.

but i'm excited about this new desire and new way to live.